It can be hard to find the energy or time to exercise when overwhelmed and depressed. However, it does help somewhat. Maybe it’s the endorphins.  Maybe it’s the exhaustion that follows it. 

I mostly walk. One day last week I accidentally walked 6 miles (there were no mile markers in the middle of the loop.) 

Doug and I used to walk together a lot. That is one of the many many things I miss about our life together. I usually end up walking alone now. 

Walking alone has its pros and cons, like everything
With Doug, as long as we weren’t right in the middle of something, we could take off.  We were in synch.  We knew each other’s pace. We knew how far we could and would want to go (although he often overestimated the “how far” part) and the degree of difficulty that worked for me (another thing he did have a tendency to overestimate.)  We could talk and laugh, or just look around - it didn't matter as long as we were together. 

It’s harder to line up a friend and just go.  Especially one you don’t live with or near. They may not want to go at the same time. They may not want to go the same distance, speed, or to the same location.

So it is easier to go by myself.

However, walking alone is lonely.  It seems like most people are going in the other direction.
The time passes much more slowly. There is no one to talk to except myself. There is a lot of time to think, which can be good or bad. I get lost too.  Doug was my navigator.

Walking alone is kind of like life alone.

09/04/2010

MORE

• Stages of Grief
• Keeping Busy
• The things I miss most about Doug and our life together
• Team Z Walk with friends
• Redefining Loneliness
• Why it is unlikely that I will ever be so lucky in love again
• Bereavement Support Groups - pros, cons, bottom line (10/04/2010)